Wednesday, November 11, 2009

I miss him


Lately I've been spending my times thinking about him. I'm missing him, so much. I still can feel his presence in our life, just like he's only out for work and will be back home in the evening. I can still hear his voice inside my ears. His smile lingers in my eyes.

But the matter of fact is, he's too far away from us by now. And there's nothing I can do to keep him back to us. I can only pray for his peace and Allah's blessings upon him.

He was always there when I needed help and raising me up when my world was going down. He's more than just a brother. He was a father, a friend, a leader.

I really miss his words, motivating me to go through every trouble with calm. We used to went through troubles together. Being with him made it easier when life gets hard. He knew how to make people smile. Anything he said, never something to irritate others. His dream was big, to make everyone that he knows happy.

Now I have to face this fate that he's gone, forever. All I can do is just keep on praying for him. May peace and Allah's blessings be with him.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

WHEN...


When she seems to keep away from me
When her song doesn't sound as good anymore
When the melody of our song disappeared with the wind
When there's no more cheerful good morning wishes
When my nights seem to be lonesome and dull
When my phone tend to be quiet all day long
When my messages doesn't get any reply
When I try to put up with it and failed
When I feel that she needs me no more

That's when I know she's just a dream
A beautiful nightmare that I never wanna wake up from
But the nature of dream is, it comes and goes easily
When the sun smiles and the moon falls asleep
The dream left to be just a memory
Then the memory stand alone all on itself
And vanished when the days come and go

And I am just a dream
And a dream never last for long

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

DO I NEED TO BE IN LOVE?


Sometimes I am wondering too much about LOVE. For a guy at my age, most people would say that I should have a girlfriend-a very typical way of thinking. And some of them says that it's kind of abnormal not to have one. Some even accuses that I am a gay, just because I don't have a girlfriend. Whoa, that's too much i guess. The question is, do I really have to have one? Well, I have no answer for that..

I am currently getting somewhat close to a very best female friend, but I'm not sure if that's love. I have to admit that I feel nice and cozy chatting with her as she knows me really well. I tell her my problems and she tells hers to me too. I feel that she is who I belong to be with. But that's just my poor instinct's wishful thinking. I do feel happy, but is that love?

I don't want to get stranded alone in the jungle called love. What if she doesn't really like me? And the most important thing is, I have promised myself to try to avoid getting in love matter before I find someone who really loves me. I have a faith that my destiny is in God's hand. So, I would prefer just to let it comes naturally to me when the time is here.

But sometimes, I tend to get confused between my instinct and my principle. I want to stand on my principle, but at the same time have a feeling to love and be loved. May Allah leads me to the rightest path of life..

Monday, September 14, 2009

untitled


Feel to write something, but somehow don't know what to write about. Just now, i logged into my friendster account and bumped into some of my old friends' profiles. Looking at their pictures after years not seeing each other, makes me think about the old times. The times we had together. Most of them look different than before, the time we were together in secondary school.

Now after years, I'm glad that they still recall my name and my look. Proving that I'm still the same me that I used to be. For some of them, I don't even recognize their look nor the name as they're using different name for their profiles.

Back to the school times, I was a person who loves to keep myself out from the crowd. Lack of self confidence, I only had a few friends who was really befriended with me. Still remember their names and, sure, their look. Azad, Yusri, Wicit, Noriah were amongst who I really befriended with. Maybe that time I thought I have a very bad look, that's why my self-esteem vanished easily and I didn't have much friends. But now that I'm a grown up guy, I tend to learn that the look doesn't really has anything to do with my confidence. As long as I feel comfortable, then I'll get my confidence.

One of the things I've learnt from school times, never compare myself to another person. I am what I am, differently from what they are. If they think I look weird, I would say no, I look unique instead.

Anyway, really happy+amazed with some of them who has make it with their life. Some of them even has their own car and properties. And me? hehe. Still the same........

Monday, June 29, 2009

SUCCESS


When i heard that one of my friend is setting up his very own company, I was like ,wow.. He's moving forward while I'm still here one year after finishing my study. Yeah, I'm quite impressed and amazed by his courage on running his own business. Hopefully he will make it in current global economical issues. Plus with limited knowledge and experience in administering the business.

That's his story. What about me? I've made it too, in my own way. From zero to hero. (hahaha) Because I see an achievement as something that i've gained by my own effort, never care about the value because for me an achievement is invaluable. And sometimes even failure can be seen as an achievement when it teaches me to come back for more and never give up easily.

I called my very best friend last night, chatting about so many things. She told me about her work, and I told her mine. We were laughing at each other for what happened to both of us. Complaining about our current life compared to other friends who has better life. Then we realized that life is not just about obtaining something that we wish for, its likely about going through what we sometimes hate, and be back for something better. Well, sometimes life is funny and thank God for everything i've achieved until today, and that i still have what i own today.

The road to success is not an easy and smooth path, there are so many sadness, failure and rejection to find along the way to get it. I came across a writing indicating that one must face failure in order to succeed, and there's no escape from that. That's why I said, even failure can be seen as an achievement. So, never evaluate your success only from the property you have or may have. Open your eyes and see deeper in your life that you must have something to be proud with.. and that's your real success.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

WHEN I FEEL down...

Have you ever feel like hiding away from the surrounding world? Feeling desolated by what had happened on you today, or yesterday, or the past times? Or maybe for some serious cases, feel useless and hopeless?

I know how it feels as i do feel it sometimes.. and believe me, it doesn't feel good.
When i feel down, I tend to be vulnerable and sensitive which results to a short term isolation. Most of the time, I like to go calming myself alone at the park and usually it works. After spending a few moments, I can feel the energy is back and there i am ready again.

Nevertheless, that method doesn't really work for some cases. For instant when I feel financially depressed, it takes me some advance methods of solving it. Being at the park for financial problem doesn't make it any better. There should be other way to solve the problem, not just sit back and let it be. My solution based on the cause.

And I am very grateful to Allah for every strength He gave me to find solution to my problems.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

TIPS:HOW TO DEAL WITH CRITICSM AND AVOID STRESS


If you are a person who only loves to hear praises and good comments, make up your mind and get real. There's no one who can be totally perfect from every angle. Every normal human being will at least do something wrong in his whole life, and I firmly believe in that. And the sequence of the mistake done is CRITICISM which most of the time hurts especially for those who is vulnerable to criticism. Thus, learning on how to take the criticism in a healthy way shall help us from feeling down.

1. Listen to what a critic is saying. Really listen, try to understand that point of view, don’t just nod while you formulate your retorts.

2. Don’t be defensive. This is the toughest step. You may have your own point, but try to remind your self , “I welcome criticism. This person is helping me. I’m eager to hear how to improve myself/life.”

3. Don’t fire back by criticizing your critic. Your comments will just sound defensive, and you’ll escalate the exchange. This urge is very difficult to resist, because the impulse to justify and attack is strong when you feel criticized, but it just isn’t helpful, and it certainly isn’t effective.

4. Delay your reaction. Count to ten, take a deep breath, sleep on it, wait until the next day to react to the critic…any kind of delay is good. For example, when you’re upset about something that happened to you, don't let yourself do anything about it for few moment – and sometimes no action is better than action.

5. Explain honestly the reason for your actions. Sometimes it’s tempting to re-characterize your actual feelings and motives. Usually, though, that just complicates things more. It becomes impossible to have an honest exchange.

6. Admit your mistakes. This is extremely effective and disarming. When I got my first job, my father told me, “If you take the blame, you’ll get the responsibility.” I’ve found that to be very true. Difficult, but true. Admitting mistakes is the first step, then…

7. Explain what you’ve learned. If you can show a critic that you’ve learned something, you prove that you’ve understood the criticism and tried to act on it. That, itself, usually mollifies critics.

8. Enjoy the fun of failure. Re-frame the issue entirely to embrace criticism. Fact is, trying new things and aiming high opens you to criticism. Tell yourself to enjoy the fun of failure to try to re-frame failure and criticism as part of the fun. Otherwise, your dread of criticism can paralyze you.

-a part of this article quoted from an article written by Gretchen Rubin.